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Here’s what the GTA IV downloadable content SHOULD be


While we’re not even getting the announced GTA: Lost and Damned content, due to Microsoft’s clever use of cash to lure Rockstar away from the PS3, it hasn’t prevented me from being disappointed. I would’ve stumped up the cash for some DLC, had the concept captured my imagination, but bikers? Really? Not GTA enough for me.

Well, not old GTA enough for me. Now that the franchise takes itself seriously with its moral choices, Philip Glass music and deeply unhappy endings – all of which I admire, really – it won’t dare to do something stupid, fun and utterly hilarious.

Here’s my idea: a monster in Liberty City. Over where the sunken tankers are, on Alderney, have a giant monster emerge out of the water in real-time, triggered as soon as you enter the vicinity. Visually, it would be a terrifying sight. You’d watch as the LCPD, FBI, Army and eventually Navy try to take it down, while Roman (hopefully Kate died in your GTA IV save file, or you’ll feel like killing yourself) gives you a phone call along these lines: “Holy shit, cousin!”. You then have to take a chopper up to its head, pummel its face with rockets and go inside its mouth, where it’s revealed that the monster ate the heart of Liberty City from the Statue of Happiness! Ridiculous, but amusing.

Cloverfield did it to New York, so I’m sure there’d be no moral objection to having a rampaging, giant monster in Liberty City. You could even do aftermath chapters, where the entire city descends into a state of emergency.

Biker gangs sound great too, though.

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  • Nathan Deakin

    Now that sounds like a good idea… god damn it i can just imagine that an it would be so cool!!

  • Anon

    Good idea! They can implement a helicopter with grappling hook guns so it can hold the monster in place while Roman rolls the shrink ray out too!

  • WolF

    dude Great minds think alike :P… ive always imagined monsters in GTA universe…. atleast dey shudve released an expansion pack of such for sanandreas (pc)… where dere were miles and miles of open space… begging for monsters… my personal fav wud be a tremor like monster in d deserts of GTA:SA.. hey juss sayin 😛

  • Monkeymenace

    Hell yea! i also think that having a serial killer let loose or a deadly zombie virus is let loose. think 28 days later but in GTA enviroment!!

  • David Macphail

    That has got to be THE most idiotic idea i’ve ever heard of for DLC in my life! What exactly does a giant sea monster have to do with a life of crime spent pursuing the “American dream”???

    While we’re at it why not have flying dragons setting fire to the city, for no reason and people randomly turning into household appliances such as toasters and vaccum cleaners???

  • Colin S.

    That would be awesome… a giant monster just appears. It would be cooler if you had to pick up roman a drive like hell! Then it would be chasing you then roman starts launching rockets… thats something i would pay for.

  • how do you get it

  • when is it comming out