Worst FPS Maps Ever
It’s an attention grabbing headline but that’s because you put the word ‘worst’ in anything and everyone wants to read it. It’s the car crash factor. So confession time, this isn’t actually a definitive collection of the absolute worst FPS maps of all time but that’s because it would involve playing terrible maps on terrible multiplayer games in what would be a terrible waste of time.
These are awful maps in FPS games everyone has played to a large extent. So this list is maybe the most disappointing FPS maps? Most infuriating? Most out of place? You can decide. You’re here and reading now, that’s the important part. It’s why blogs are awesome – I can make up the rules as I go along. So here are the Worst FPS Maps Ever! Maybe.
3. Nuketown (Call of Duty: Black Ops)
One of the most infuriating (there you go) multiplayer maps ever made, there has never been an arena less suited to Team Deathmatch in Call of Duty. Teams will meet in the middle of the creepy town, then engage in a firefight. The losers will spawn in the back of the house where they try to scramble back towards the middle, only to find the team that just killed them have cut off their exit points. They’re killed again. They spawn behind the house again.
There’s a sliding slope of defeat that begins when you’re killed, as you hope your team-mates have done just enough to stop your side being pushed back into the spawn point. If you are stuck there, there’s no mercy as you’re locked in with no escape. As you spawn into endless deaths, the other team will rack up killstreaks too, and eventually you spawn into a dogs-infested area as your radar is jammed while planes spew napalm from above.
You know it’s a bad map when you can tell which side is going to win after 15 seconds.
2. Pyrrhus Rise (Killzone 2)
It’s a good idea in theory. A big, open map with three bridges in the middle that serve as the focal area for all that space, driving players to meet in the middle for a frantic shooting spree. You can picture the design meetings in your head as the programmers sat around and nodded sagely, agreeing what a good idea it is.
Sadly, what works in theory doesn’t work in practice. The wide open spaces gave snipers the luxury of time, as they sat back and trained their scopes on anyone who dared to cross the bridges. This gives the map a hesitant, awkward pace as players decide whether it’s worth running the gauntlet of sniper fire. Worse still, if they do somehow survive crossing the bridge, they’re immediately greeted by the other team who are also wondering when to dare their chances to do the same. Dying on such a large map then means spawning miles away from action. Sigh.
1. Rust (Modern Warfare 2)
Some maps, you just wonder – at what point did this seem like a good idea? Rust’s square arena of death is an absolute mess, where random grenade throws will often get you random kills, you’ll die without knowing why and anyone who lucks their way to a decent killstreak will then go on to win the match.
The idea – I think – is that the mayhem on the bottom drives players to try and scale the tower in the middle to get away from the carnage. Yet it’s far too easy for players to pick off those scaling the structure, with the resulting spawn pulling them back to ground level as they add another gun to the chaos.
The small size rules it out for objective games, the carnage makes it too messy for Free-For-All and the random spawning makes it… well, random for Team Deathmatch. A horrible map with the only saving grace being it was impossible for campers to thrive on it.
I’m sure there are plenty I’ve missed out on and some of you will disagree with those, so comment and tell me why I’m wrong. Are there any maps worse than Rust? I really won’t believe you without a convincing argument. Or a YouTube video of you swearing. And no, they’re not the same thing.