Here’s what the GTA IV downloadable content SHOULD be
While we’re not even getting the announced GTA: Lost and Damned content, due to Microsoft’s clever use of cash to lure Rockstar away from the PS3, it hasn’t prevented me from being disappointed
While we’re not even getting the announced GTA: Lost and Damned content, due to Microsoft’s clever use of cash to lure Rockstar away from the PS3, it hasn’t prevented me from being disappointed. I would’ve stumped up the cash for some DLC, had the concept captured my imagination, but bikers? Really? Not GTA enough for me.
Well, not old GTA enough for me. Now that the franchise takes itself seriously with its moral choices, Philip Glass music and deeply unhappy endings – all of which I admire, really – it won’t dare to do something stupid, fun and utterly hilarious.
Here’s my idea: a monster in Liberty City. Over where the sunken tankers are, on Alderney, have a giant monster emerge out of the water in real-time, triggered as soon as you enter the vicinity. Visually, it would be a terrifying sight. You’d watch as the LCPD, FBI, Army and eventually Navy try to take it down, while Roman (hopefully Kate died in your GTA IV save file, or you’ll feel like killing yourself) gives you a phone call along these lines: “Holy shit, cousin!”. You then have to take a chopper up to its head, pummel its face with rockets and go inside its mouth, where it’s revealed that the monster ate the heart of Liberty City from the Statue of Happiness! Ridiculous, but amusing.
Cloverfield did it to New York, so I’m sure there’d be no moral objection to having a rampaging, giant monster in Liberty City. You could even do aftermath chapters, where the entire city descends into a state of emergency.
Biker gangs sound great too, though.