The real life of... Daxter
Our sensational (and monthly) look at a PlayStation icon

DAXTER WAS THE annoying child at school. You know the one we mean: he was the smart-mouthed little punk that really fancied himself as a comedian, though the other kids never really agreed. Daxter was a joker, alright, but the other kids didn’t laugh. In fact, the opposite of laughter is probably the most applicable truth in this tale of lost identity, furry genitalia and mute elves. Anyway, let us tell the story of Daxter, a creature that has annoyed thrice as many as he has endeared himself to.

We’re not too fussed about the time prior to Jak And Daxter: The Precursor Legacy (mainly because we couldn’t be bothered to research it), but before the events of that game he was a normal human being. He had a purple beard, probably, and we could never really shake the preconception that he was a massive fool. This coincided well with fate, however, as the man tumbled into a vat of Dark Eco on Misty Island and became a new kind of creature. This disgusting specimen, known as an Ottsel (a combination of otter and weasel), would be the turning point in Daxter’s life. Suddenly, he had experienced a vast personal change, and actually seemed to be doing stuff. It was a bit like puberty, really, only the quantity of bodily fur was much, much higher.

So, after collecting power cells on the shoulder of Jak, his mute best friend of many years, Daxter actually found his transformation to be a remarkably benefi cial one. Running around a large island, collecting power cells with his buddy Jak; it appeared that this creature had found his niche, although the next game in the series would make things irreversibly darker.

It was all gangsters, prostitutes and stray needles; Daxter had hit the world of free roaming, and it changed him as an animal. Sure, every person in the world hated him by then, but that didn’t stop the people from paying actual cash for Jak II: Renegade. After that, everything became boring, and Jak decided to take to the race circuit in the desert and leave the interesting parts of the series in the past.

Shortly after the apathetic Jak X, Daxter was at the brink of his own end. Knowing that his aggravating voice was too much for the PS2, Daxter decided to bring the pain to the portable instead, fronting his own spin-off title back in 2006. He left Jak, his now oversexed former best friend, in the past. Weirdly enough, Daxter didn’t completely tank on the PSP. The good bits of this generic platformer may have been as elusive as a homosexual dodo, but it sold over halfa- million copies. Did he deserve it? Well, the answer is no, considering that we gave that half-arsed jolly a score of 65%, but the high sales indicate that this franchise is still buoyant. Piss off, Daxter. We’re bored now.